WARM UP

1. This weekend we explored the importance of being mindful of the timing and manner in how we communicate with others. When have you received a word of encouragement that came at just the right time?

This is such a great question that can really create some positive conversation! If you have some quiet individuals this might be an easy question for them to feel confident participating in.

2. Even with the best intentions, sometimes we want to give advice to others who haven’t asked for it. When in your life have you received or given unsolicited advice? How might advice be received differently when it’s requested?

As a leader you can start the conversation by sharing your own story of when you’ve given unsolicited advice.  Your honesty will help the group be more comfortable sharing as well.

Additional questions for follow up: “What do you think the advice givers intention is when they gave advice?”  “How did you feel after receiving the unsolicited advice? What would have helped you receive it better?”

3. What resonated with you most from hearing this weekend’s message?

 

KNOW IT   

1. In his message, Larry shared that how we speak to others is just as important as what we have to say, even if it’s right. As you read 1 Peter 3:8-12, what do you find challenging about applying this instruction to your words and conversations? How might following Peter’s instruction give you more credibility?

Feel free to read the passage out loud and encourage a moment of reflection. 

Reframing the Question: “It’s not always easy to speak with gentleness and respect, especially when we’re passionate about what we’re saying. What situations or people make it hard for you to speak this way?”

You could also brainstorm some ideas as a group or smaller groups on how to practice Peter’s guidance this week, perhaps by selecting specific relationships or settings where they want to be mindful of our tone and approach.

2. Discuss the importance of gentleness and respect in conversations in light of 1 Peter 3:15-16. How does this guidance change our interactions?

What’s really rad about the passage above is that it is because of our character that someone would ask us about our faith.   

Additional Scripture: Colossians 4:5-6 “Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” 

 Titus 3:2 “To slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and always to be gentle toward everyone.”

Additional Question:  Why do you think God makes such an important emphasis that Christians communicate in this style?

 

SHARE IT

1. Whether at home, work, school, or church, can you think of a time when you wished you had remembered Proverbs 18:13 before you spoke?

This question can be a great way to bring some humor into your group discussion time.  Sharing silly stories of when we have put our foot in our mouth can be a great bounding experience.

2. Have you ever been asked to share a reason for your faith? If so, how did you respond and how did the conversation go? If not, how would what you’ve learned this week help you?

Make sure you break this question down into the two questions it is.  One for if they have been asked and the second what have they have learned. Everyone can have an answer to this question.   If your group is up for it you could role play a scenario of someone asking and allow people a turn in even just how they would share their faith!

 

LIVE IT

1. Larry gave us a Gentleness Self-Test. As you look at this test, how do you think you’re doing? If you were to focus on just one aspect this week, which do you think would make the biggest difference in your interactions?

• Gentleness Discusses – Harshness Argues

• Gentleness Influences – Harshness Irritates

• Gentleness Cares – Harshness is Resentful
• Gentleness Listens – Harshness Talks Past People

I would spend the majority of my discussion in this question on which would make the biggest difference if I were to focus on it.  The next question really drives into application of today’s discussion.

2. How can you practice being “quick to listen” in your daily interactions? Is there a relationship in your life where you’d like to become a more attentive listener?

It’s okay to acknowledge that we have areas we need to grow in. You could also ask your group of there have been any recent interactions that highlight where they have done well or could grow in.  Allowing ourselves to look backwards and reflect can also help us to be better prepared in how we grow moving forward.

Breaking into smaller groups could also foster deeper sharing and connecting as well as encouragement in how we plan to take steps in growing.

 

FINAL THOUGHT: PRAY FOR OUR ELECTED OFFICIALS
As followers of Jesus, we’re called to embrace the opportunity to pray for God’s Spirit to guide our leaders,
both locally and nationally. 

“I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people—²for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. ³This is good, and pleases God our Savior, ⁴who wants all people to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth.” (1 Timothy 2:1–4) 

• Pray for those who are newly elected and those continuing in their roles. Ask God to guide them with wisdom and compassion, so they lead in a way that promotes peace and justice. Pray they will see the value of Godly wisdom and come to know Jesus and follow him.  
• Ask for God’s help in our own lives, that we may reflect His love and truth in our communities. Pray for the strength to live in unity, bringing hope and kindness to those around us. 
• Give thanks that our God cares deeply for everyone and wants all to know His love and truth.
• Pray that God draws our nation closer to Him, bringing healing and unity. And that the people of our nation will see their need for Jesus and the love, forgiveness, and freedom he offers them.